Re: another broken heart Samarra: Hi braveheart.
A small consolation....but.....we are all lonely.
Here's a different perspective from the leaver (is there a better word??)
I left my boyfriend. I loved him. I still do.
Love simply is not enough when other problems are present. His problem? Cheating. He had a neat philosophy. He believed people placed too many restrictions on each other sexually.....he tried sooo hard to make me see his point and make me indulge in his way of thinking, Alas.....I have a mind of my own and didn't buy into his horsesh*t.
I believe in monogamy as uncool as that may be.....so in the end I told him to piss off,
This has left me with unresolved issues.....but ones I am working out. There are different ways of coming to terms with your feelings.
Going for counseling is an option and doesn't mean you are weak....in fact.....it's quite the opposite. Recognizing you have a problem and dealing with it is healthy and proves you have the strength others don't.
Too often we deny these feelings and "stuff them down" denying they're even there, This is also a coping mechanism and may work for a while but those feelings will eventually resurface and then what?? You gotta deal sooner or later.
Your particular situation is absolutely intolerable......you're married and he's living with another woman. Sweetie....it's no wonder you feel this way. Do whatever you need to do to keep your sanity.....OK...let me clarify. Anything within legal limits. I know you probably want to wring his neck.....how could you not??? Lacking that option.....try counseling....it's not for everyone.....but talking it out can help you gain much needed perspective. Too often we blame ourselves....when we should be looking at the other persons' behaviour and why they treated us so poorly. What was lacking within them. You'll find alot of answers that will help you to realize it was not you.....and ways to avoid this type of relationship in the future.
Whatever you decide.....I wish you all the best!